Peace

Oh the peace of the Lord is a precious thing. One craves it at all times, even if there seems to be enjoyment in the present turmoil or upheaval. We always come back to that precious stream of life which sounds of rippling water. It envelopes our souls and washes over all pain and discouragement.

Signing off for now........
Trusting

Joyful

Praise God for his joy!!!! I am so thankful for the worship service on Sunday. I was able to worshpi and praise the Lord getting close to his very throne and desiring to press in closer and closer to him and to be near to his heart.

When I worship, that is my goal, to feel the very heartbeat of my Lord, to sense his presence, and to feel his security and peace.

Oh, to know him and to worship him!!!!!!

Signing off for now.........
Trusting

Saturday

I am thankful for this day to be off from school. For some reason, I am looking forward to cleaning, cooking, and doing wash. I feel like that it my acceptance in this house. I guess I feel like "a good mom" would do all those things. Not that I like to do them, but guess I have a vested interested. My husband loves when those things are done and I do long to bless him.

I must once again ask forgiveness for my complacency. I don't know why it is so difficult for me to be happy and praise the Lord? It just seems to take so much work even to be nice to the people around me at work and at my home. There isn't much in the way of joyful praise in my life right now.

God, I ask forgiveness for my lack of feeling, but do trust that deep within, I am committed to serving you. Lord, speak to my heart this day as I go about doing housework and also keep me in check. Bring a healthy humbleness within me.

Thank you for the shoes last night. It was as if they were waiting for me. I thank you for giving me direction for where to go. I also thank you for speaking to my heart regarding restraint. Lord, I pray that you would go with Dave and Ben today. I pray that you would give them wisdom concerning their purchase.

Lord, thank you for not letting us go.

Signing off for now...........
Trusting

Lack of Motivation

Good morning,

I sit here before you with little joy or motivation. I have little peace in my home and lament that fact that my children are always asking for money and I can't give it to them. I lament the fact that my husband is seeming to be bipolar these days. I'm not sure if he is going to be nice or mean. I know he hurts a lot in his body. That makes me grumpy too. I should do a thankful list.

I am thankful that my family is healthy, that I have a car to drive, that I was able to go to my son's drumline show and pay for it. That I have private students that help supplement my income. That I have a husband who can make meals. That I was able to clean the house this weekend. That I was able to sleep on SAturday. That I was able to do a lot of reading for my research paper. That I have a job to go to today. That I am going to get two planning periods today. That the sun is shining. That Jesus loves me and died for me.

Well, if that isn't enough to get me out of the lack of motivation and into the thankful and positive vein. I thank God for his love and mercy, even though I am not where I would want to be right now in my life.

Signing off for now........
Trusting

Comforting with the Comfort we Receive

Good morning,

This is my last day off for Easter break. I am blessed to say that I am feeling relaxed and anticipating going back to complete the rest of my school year!!!

God blessed me with a precious opportunity to minister to a sister in our church yesterday. She and her husband and young son are hanging on by a thread financially. I was so moved to not only hear her story, but to hear her heart and share her burden.

God gifted me with words of prayer that not only were an encouragement to my sister, but also to me. I was able to hear her story and feel her pain. I know if my family wasn't experiencing the very same thing, I would not have been able to fellowship her suffering.

I know God poured out His love and power by his Holy Spirit as I grasped both my sister's hands and held tightly, both of us agreeing in the spirit for God's provision in their lives to sustain and keep them.

These days, it isn't about God's abundance. It's about his keeping power and his grace to keep going. These are hard lessons to learn, but I believe that in the days to come we will need to rely more and more on his provision and supernatural keeping of our very lives.

This past weekend, I spent most of it proclaiming and praising God, even though, in my natural feelings, I did not feel to. I wanted to stand on God's words and praise him even though I didn't feel like it. Isn't that what a sacrifice truly is, giving something that is difficult to give?

I shared the need of my brother and sister in Christ with my husband and we both agreed to gift them some money. Not that we are in any place to do that, except for the grace of God, but I believe not only will it bless them, but also honor my Lord God Almighty!!!

One other thing that I heard from the Lord this weekend was that I was to "dig deeper" as I desire to seek his face and press into him in a greater way. I believe that I will be rewarded with precious heavenly treasures as I follow his lead in meeting him in a deeper way!!!!

Signing off for now........
Trusting

Signing off for now........
Trusting

choosing to praise

Good morning,

I am blessed to be home today and the sun is shining. While I am not understanding many things in this life, I am choosing to praise today!!!! MY GOD WILL SUPPLY ALL MY NEEDS!!!!!

Blessed be his name today and forever!!!!

Signing off for now......
Trusting

Short week

Good morning,

This is a short work week due to the Easter holiday coming up. I don't feel good, very low, physically, but optimistic spiritually.

I cleaned on Saturday and my back did not enjoy that. It is revolting even now as we speak. Yesterday, church was disheartening. We have issues with our worship team. The instrument leaders are not able to stay together. It's very difficult to press in and worship the Lord in situations as such.

I don't know what to say, I guess I just have to let it go, but my insides are screaming that this is wrong. I will lift it up to God in prayer.

Signing off for now............
Trusting

Happy Friday!!!!!!!!

Dear readers,

Good morning, and praise God for this day!!!!!! It is a Friday and this week I have felt a huge lifting on the heaviness I felt in my spirit during the past weeks.

My husband has gotten a few jobs to keep him going and he's gotten paid two weeks in a row. I was telling the girls at work that I can't remember the last time that has happened.

I thank God for the lifting of the extreme pressure!!!! Also, I just want to cry when I walk in my kitchen because there is a new stove!!! My husband and I bought a scratch and dent stove 16 years ago. It started smelling like propane and we couldn't get it to stop. The repair man said that there was a gas leak and we needed to buy a new one.

I was constantly reminded of the gas leak everytime I would enter our home because of the fumes I smelled. It put a concern in my heart for our safety and let me say it again, God provided a new stove!!!!!! We were able to go to our favorite appliance store and buy a new one for at least two hundred dollars less than we would have gotten anywhere else.

Thank you, Lord, for remembering us........... in this special way!!!!!!!!!

I am blessed!!!
Signing off for now..........
Trusting

Slow waking up

Good morning,

I don't seem to have a lot of motivation this morning. It was rainy most of the day yesterday and then today it is foggy. It is amazing how we are affected by our surroundings. Much like when things surrounding us are depressing and oppressive, we tend to flow in that direction without much difficulty.

It is easy to "go with the flow" when things around us seem bleak, but the real challenge is can we overcome the bleakness with the light and spirit of God that lives within us?

My challenge today is to live and go forth as a victorious daughter of the King. Whether I rise to that challenge, the choice is mine.

Signing off for now.......
Trusting

Believing

Good morning,

I am blessed this morning to hear the birds singing. I am blessed this morning to wake up with a song of praise on my heart. I am blessed this morning that my Lord and Savior loves me, so very much so, that he died for me.

I am light in my spirit today. Praise God!!!!!

Yesterday we had such a wonderful worship service!!! I knew though, as I went to sit down, that just by looking at my husband that he was reeling with dizziness again. I asked him what he wanted to do. He said that it was a bad one and that he couldn't get up. He said that he thought he wanted prayer.

I waited until our assistant pastor was done with annoucements and had asked for testimonies. I raised my hand and was called on. I explained Dave's immediate need for prayer and how this was entirely an attack of the enemy. When he was invited to go up for prayer, I had to say that he couldn't stand and walk. The body rallied around Dave and began to pray.

The prayer was very effective!!! Praise God, the spinning began to slow!!!! The rest of the service was filled with words of encouragement to "wait upon the Lord". I woke up this morning with the lyrics "so I wait on you, so I wait on you, I'm falling on my knees, offering all of me, Jesus, you're all this heart is living for!!!

Our praise yesterday was warfare and we as a body and as a family will continue to stand and wait upon the Lord!!!!

Signing off for now.....
Trusting

thankful

Good morning,

So thankful that my paycheck registered and that we didn't overdraw our accounts. The Lord told us to trust him, but I think I might have gotten a "C" in that area. Yesterday I really succombed to the stress and pressure of the possible overdraft of our accounts.

I am glad that it is a Friday and that we have money to go grocery shopping!!!!!

Signing off for now........
Trusting

A Fresh New Day

Good morning,

I am thankful for the peaceful night's sleep that both my husband and I got. I am thankful that I was able to get up and put my mind to things that needed to be attended to in order to get my day going.

I just heard the creaking of the old wooden steps as my husband came downstairs. He turned the computer on. It's a Monday. That means, in this house, that he is looking over the finances and figuring out what bills to pay or not to pay.

Thankfully when God gave his son his mission instructions that he did not include in those final orders who to save and who not to. His blood was shed for all of us!!! It was shed for every man, woman, and child who ever set foot on this earth. The power of the blood of Christ is and always will be the most powerful weapon that could ever be.

Think about the most powerful weapon on this earth. It would have to be the bombs of mass destruction. Even when I think about the possible impact they could have on mankind, killing thousands of millions of people, the blood of Jesus far exceeds the reach of any missile that could be projected to destroy mankind.

Praise God for his awesome power and saving grace!!!!!!
Signing off for now.......
Trusting

fighting for joy

Good morning,

Today I find myself wiped of all sense of hope and encouragement. I have been in this place before. It is a very lonely place. I have so much pain and sadness inside and have a hard time even looking at other people for fear of them knowing my secret.

I fear that on the inside I am indeed wretched and condemned. I only can trust in the blood of our Lord Jesus Christ that has been shed to pay the price for my sin. I hope and pray that today I can receive the cleansing power of the Lord, even though I am so tormented within my spirit.

I pray that I can rise up and overcome the sadness and the pain and I can see the Lord high and lifted up this day.

I thank him for his hand of protection upon our lives and acknowledge that if his hand was lifted from our lives that we would be prey to the onslaught of the enemy with no restriction.

I pray this day that God will enable me to open my heart once again and allow him to see the pain and touch it in a way that only he can.

Signing off for now........
Trusting

stilling the waves

Good morning,

This has been a rough one. Husband woke up with intense vertigo. Vomitted violently at least 10 times. The room was spinning out of control for him. All I could do was sit, watch him wretch while sitting on the edge of our bed pouring out the contents of his stomach into our bathroom trash can. If the vomitting and dizziness wasn't enough, he then got hit with cold sweats and muscle spasms.

Both of us knew in our hearts that this was NOT right. I stood dutifully by his side offering him tissues, sips of water, and periodically rinsing out the trash can.

As wave after wave of this vertigo gripped my husband I sensed in my spirit that I needed to take authority over this attack. At first I thought, but Lord, what if after I pray, that nothing happens and I look like a fool for trying. I weighed that in my mind as I watched my husband suffering and shaking uncontrollably.

Finally, I asked Dave if I could pray for him. He immediately said, "yes". That was the encouragement that I needed. I knew that if I opened my mouth that God would fill it with weapons of warfare. I spoke in the name of Jesus and commanded the vertigo to lose it's grip and for God to bring rest to my husband.

I was prepared to ask Dave after my prayer if it went away, only to hear him say "no"!!! But, this time, that was not the case. The rest that came upon my husband was so powerful that not only did all dizziness stop, but he fell into a deep sleep, so much so that I didn't have the heart to ask if it was gone. I saw his heavy breathing subside into shallow intakes of air that caused his entire body to relinquish itself into the peaceful sleep that was waiting to greet him as the storm came to an abrupt halt.

I only give the glory to the Lord and see him as all powerful in all things.

To God be the Glory!!!!!
Signing off for now.......
Trusting

Fooling myself

Dear readers,

I am really struggling today with finding joy. I am feeling very much like a failure. I'd like to be able to provide so many more things for my children to experience. Feel lowly and meek and defeated.

I know there is a scripture for this, but right now, it is not coming.

I pray today that God will grant me his joy.

Signing off for now..........
Still trusting

Letting the Son Shine on Me

Good morning,

I am sitting here with a whole day ahead of me. I don't have to go to work. I am going to have the pleasure of having breakfast with my mom. I am thinking that I am going to go to a music store about an hour away to get music for my private students.

I really want today to be a day filled with my heart praising the Lord and also praying for his church. I want to allow Jesus to shine on and in me and to further his cleansing work in my life.

He poured in the wine and the oil.
The kind that restoreth my soul.
He found me bleeding and dying on the Jericho road.
And he poured in the wine and the oil.

That also reminds me of the good Samaritan who willingly stopped to help a man who was his enemy. How much more should we be willing and open to our own brothers and sisters in Christ? We may not be able to control how our brothers and sisters in Christ feel or act, especially about us, but we can control our own heart responses.

I am acknowledging that there is a great emergence for God's people to stand in unity. When the gaps start to open, which occurs when dissension arises, there allows a small throughway for the enemy to step in and gain a foothold. May God help us all to stand firm in our unity and love for one another in Christ.

Hatred stirreth up strifes: but love covereth all sins. Prov 10:12

Signing off for now......
Trusting

Open the Eyes of My Heart

Good morning,

This morning I am thankful. I am thankful for God's shaping hand and for his words, his creative words. I am thankful for his heart for his people, for we are indeed sinners without the intervention of the blood of his precious son.

I was impressed on the fact that we are kings and priest and in white robes. That the work of the cross was not only enough to cleanse us from our sins, but that the work on the cross also brought us to a place where we can be leaders in him.

We are kings and priests. How does my life line up to that? Well, I can say that my heart struggles daily to remain pure and needs to go to him for a cleansing on a very regular basis. Do I think I even come close to being a king or a priest? Absolutely not. Do I believe that God has that intended for me? I do.

I'm not sure how he will do it, or how it will ever come about in my minute earthly understanding, but I do believe that there is a place in the heavenlies where all of this will come about.

He is worthy of all our praise!!!!

Signing off for now.........
Trusting

My God Shall Suppy All My Needs

Dear readers,

Again, waking up with a peace. Wow, what a blessing to have peace in a world where there is none without Jesus. I am so blessed to sit here and breathe in his peace. To not feel the panic and the weight of the world on my shoulders. Praise his wonderful name!!!!

Today's scripture reads: He loveth righteousness and judgment: the earth is full of the goodness of the Lord. Psalm 33:5

So, the Lord, loves righteousness? Wow, that is a big word full of expectation and growth! Almost too hard for me to swallow, but knowing the LOVING God that I serve, I have learned that, Praise his wonderful name, he is not a God with a huge bat waiting to slam me every time I make a mistake. He is a loving God that has a lifetime goal for us to be righteous. Let's find out what Webster has to say about righteousness.

righteous -1 : acting in accord with divine or moral law : free from guilt or sin

So, is he saying that he loves righteousness for himself or man? I think in this case it is for himself. He acts in accord with his divine law. He lives by a law himself and he is true to this. He does not sway from his holy standards.

I know he desires righteousness for his people and he will also equip us with both the desire and ability to uphold his standard of righteousness in our lives.

Signing off for now.......
Trusting

what is depressed?

Good morning,

For the word of the Lord is right; and all his works are done in truth. Psalm 33

So, that must be the answer, right? The word of the Lord is right. So when I'm in a quandry of how to handle a situation, I should go to God's word for the answer? According to this Psalm verse, the answer must be yes.

Do we always get the answer we want? NO! Do we always "find" the answer in our eyes? NO! Is God's word able to speak to our hearts and help us find answers that will "keep" us? The answer most definitely needs to be YES!!!

I believe that God's word is truth and that, through his Holy Spirit, it can rest upon me and infiltrate my being to the very core so that he can speak to my inner most cries and desires.

Does this always happen in our timing? NO!! Does that mean that God doesn't hear our prayer and act upon it? ABSOLUTELY NOT!

That is where the gift of trust comes in. God gifts us with the ability to hold on and believe in him. I am so thankful for that ability, because in myself I cannot. I tell the Lord that on a daily basis. "It's all you, I say". He brings us to the place in our lives where we can only say "Lord, you must do this, for I cannot, in myself bring change in my own life"

TO GOD BE THE GLORY!!!!!

Signing off for now.......
Trusting

knowing him

Good morning,

Today I am blessed with a peace that resulted in a letting go of a long struggle. I don't know how and when this will all culminate with change, but my decision lead to a release of my struggle. I am at peace knowing that God is going to bring change and that he is also going to use me and the giftings he has granted me in a new way to glorify him.

I have a student teacher right now. He is struggling to prove himself as a music teacher. I want to step in and do it all for him, but that wouldn't be the way to teach him. I allow him to experience uncomfortable times in the classroom and watch as he responds. It isn't easy for me to sit back and watch, but I do see the value of giving him the experience of trying to find his way.

Does God see us like that? Does he allow us to go through firey times just to see what our response is going to be? What is that response that he is desiring? I know in my heart that he wants us to trust him. He wants us to see trying times as preparation times. He wants us to know that even in the trying times, that he is very near. I praise him for not letting us go.

I do trust that as I go forth today in his peace, that he will continue to unfold his plan for our lives to further glorify him and magnify his holy name!!!!!

Signing off for now........
Trusting

perfect peace

Good morning,

Praise God for his peace. Your throne is higher. I am thankful for a full night's sleep and a restful night's sleep.

I had to quickly type an assignment for my son as his computer submission method wasn't working out. Rather than hand in a hard copy, he was just going to go in and say for the second day in a row that it didn't work on our computer. I asked him if he could just type it out and hand it in instead of submitting it online? He didn't think about that and immediately we started the mad typing to get done.

I input the information and then in the last few minutes before the bus came, he edited and finished the formatting.

I am thankful for the opportunity to help Ben this morning. It wasn't anything extremely difficult for me, but to him this was a big help. I wonder how many other things we can do in life that "to us" don't seem like a big thing, but to others it's water in the desert?

Can it be like that with the presence of God that we carry with us on a daily basis? Can it be like that with the love that we can extend through the blood of our Lord, Jesus? I believe it can. Words can go for miles upon end if spoken in love and encouragement.

Lord, help me today to be an encouragement and a blessing to those around me.

Signing off for now........
Trusting

song?

Good morning,

I am trying to remember the song I woke up with this morning.

Oh, well, it was a praise. I didn't sleep well last night. I am still overwhelmed with the whole confrontation with the lady at church. I feel that I was humbled, but didn't see the humbleness in her. I guess that is for God to take care of.

I did find a place of perfect praise yesterday in church. I worshipped the Lord and felt nothing but him. Nothing else mattered. Not one other thing in the world mattered except that I was standing before my King and all I wanted to do was to worship him.

As I was standing there amazed at the magnitude of his presence I wondered how I could be blinded by the cares of this world. Yet, as I stepped outside of his presence, it didn't take long for them to quickly crowd in and try to take a place on the throne of my life.

I believe my challenge today is to meditate on that place of perfect praise when I stood before the Lord and nothing mattered but HIM!

I must trust that as I meditate on him that all earthly things will pass away and only he will remain.

Turn your eyes upon Jesus
Look full in his wonderful face
And the things of earth will grow strangely dim
In the light of his glory and grace.

Signing off for now.........
Trusting

same day, new post

Dear readers,

I stand before you a humbled woman. Today I addressed a situation that has been rotting within me. Today I went to confront a sister because the Lord told me to. I had two things to address. The first was relatively easy. The second was heart wrenching at best.

I began to unburden my heart only to meet resistance and defense. I stood there wondering why the Lord had brought me to this place, when all the sudden I found myself confessing my jealousy of this sister. I couldn't believe the words were pouring out of my mouth. It was as if all the poison and bitterness that had welled up within me was spewing out of my being.

I found myself dumbfounded and only able to apologize. Oh how only a loving God could orchestrate a time like that. I found myself weeping and crying out to God for a cleansing. My sister listened and told me that I didn't need to be sorry. She told me that there were things about my life that she admired. I heard her.

Out of all the words she spoke though, these were the words that rang true and clear in my heart. She said that she knew I was under a lot of pressure. Oh how precious it was to me that she saw my strain and the great pressure that I was under.

It meant so much to hear her say that "she knew". So many times I feel so alone and just can't unburden myself so that I know that someone has actually heard. I knew she heard and I was so thankful.

I pray that God would continue to cleanse my heart and to speak to my heart and mind concerning his will and plan for my life.

Our assistant pastor's wife stood up today and declared that anything that we were going through right now in our lives is because it is ordained by God and we need to trust that he is planning and guiding me in the path that he has laid before me.

Signing off for now......
Trusting

Today I will praise the Lord

Good morning,

Today's song is about being forgiven.

I'm forgiven because you were forsaken.
I'm accepted, you were condemned.
I'm alive and well, your spirit lives within me
Because you died and rose again

Amazing Love, how can it be
That you my King would die for me
Amazing Love, I know it's true
And it's my joy to honor you
In all I do, I honor you

Lord, I am so thankful for the great sacrifice you made for me.

Lord, I am so thankful for the words you whisper in my ear.

Lord, I want to praise your name today

I want to know that you are near.

Today is church. My daughter will be staying home with a sore throat. My husband, my son and I will go. My son plays the drums. I did have a song worked out with my daughter to sing, but I will save that for another week when I can do it with her.

I can sense that even now God is preparing his heart to receive from ours as we worship him today.

Signing off for now.......
Trusting

I am Redeemed!!!!

Therefore the redeemed of the Lord shall return
and come with singing unto Zion, an everlasting joy shall be upon their heads.
They shall obtain gladness and joy and sorrow and mourning shall flee away!

These are the lyrics of a song we sing in our church.

This is what God put on my heart today. These are the words he wants me to hear. These are the words he is speaking to my heart. Thank you, Lord, for speaking to me.

Yesterday was a blessing of relaxing. Yesterday I though I found my birth certificate, but realized that I only had a birth notification. That won't work with obtaining a passport.

I did order one online. It will be here in about a week. While I didn't want to have to spend the money for that, I did it out of necessity.

I just want to take the opportunity to once again be thankful for my blessings. This is something that I need to do on a regular basis to thwart the plan of the enemy for me to become defeated and cast down.

Healthy children, a paycheck from our home business, my job, my computer, the opportunity to make money to send my children to church camp, my daughter is getting taken out for lunch for her birthday, my son doesn't have to go to an all day competition.

We have food to eat. We have a roof over our head. We have music in our home. We have laughter. I even, have a husband. I have been blessed with children. I have a new cell phone. My hair turned out better than expected last night. I get to ask my daughter if she wants to help me make cinnamon rolls or coffee cake for this morning.

I have two cars that are in working condition. I am going to school for my master's degree.

I just feel that I could go on, not to brag, but to declare the faithfulness of the Lord in my Life.

I sense his presence right now and it is bringing peace and assurance. My questions are heard. I thank you, Lord, for your overcoming spirit which can rest upon me.

I bless and glorify your holy name!!!!!!!

Signing off for now..........
Trusting

Home Again

Good morning,

Today is another snow day. I could look at it as being another wasted day at home and dread what the day will bring with my children being irritable and my husband being defeated, but I choose to look at it as another day that I can praise the Lord and hear his sweet voice.

I was reminded this morning to put on the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness. There is a scripture for that

Isaiah 61:3

To appoint unto them that mourn in Zion, to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the LORD, that he might be glorified.

I do want to go forth today with a garment of praise. What color will it be? Well, of course it will be purple, which is my favorite color. It will have gold trim as well. I will have a tambourine in my hand and will be wearing dancing shoes.

I will dance before my Lord this day even though in the natural things seem bleak.

My husband has an inner ear condition and this week it has worsened. He is getting dizzy at least twice a day and just needs to sit down and wait for it to subside. Praise God that he is going for an ear test today to help determine if there is anything that can be done for him.

Lord, I ask that today you would give me a "garment of praise" for my "spirit of heaviness". I ask this for the rest of my family as well. I pray that as my husband goes for his ear test that his condition would become clearer in the test results and that a solution can come forth in dealing with this issue. I pray that you would help me to be a blessing to him and that you would help me to find my birth certificate so I can apply for my passport. I know you know where it is and I do ask that you would lead me to it.

Signing off for now........
Trusting

Feeling Sleepy

Good morning,

I am definitely feeling sleepy. We had school cancelled due to weather. I am looking out my window and seeing minimal slow fallage ( if that is a word). IMHO I think we should have gone this morning and had a half day. IMHO

Today I am going to clean out my refridgerator. It is a gross mess and it has been a long time in coming. I am hoping for some kind of connection with the Lord as I clean it out as well. He is always faithful to speak to my heart when I am cleaning.

My husband was telling me today that he was crying out to the Lord and he felt that the only answer that he received was to "not fail to see the humor in all things". I was reminded as we were driving home from the store this morning, that we only have these moments once in our lifetimes and that we should ENJOY them.

Immediately I reached over and punched my husband in the arm. I wanted to enjoy the moment. I told him why I punched him and then he reached over and honked the horn of my car. Yes, that was enjoying the moment. That should be my challenge. I so tend to focus on the moment being just another moment when I don't have the money I need to buy what I need. I need to bring those moments to life and make them coiunt for eternity by proclaiming the name of the Lord, his goodness, and his faithfulness.

Psalm 33:3 Sing unto him a new song; play skillfully with a loud noise.

He will restore all the years teh locusts have eaten!!!!

Signing off for now..........
Trusting

Rejoicing

Good morning,

Today I must get to school early. Most early mornings, I don't get to blog, but I have been so blessed with sharing with you that I have started to bring my lap top home from work so that I don't have to compete with my son to get on the computer. Hee Hee. Oh the joys of having teenagers.

I was blessed yesterday with many things yesterday, but I want to bring out two this morning. I usually have really rough dentist appt. due to some childhood trauma. I went yesterday and praise God, there was a calm over me that I have never felt before. I was so blessed to get through my whole appointment without feeling scared or even crying afterward. Praise God for his healing power!

Along those lines, I went to my parents last night to drop off some meat since our freezer is going to be used for the famous peanut butter egg sale at our church. Both of my parents were there and I talked with them for quite a while. I was so blessed to be able to connect with my father as well. We laughed and he of course said things that in the past I would have considered condescending, but this time I saw it in a different light. I saw him in a different light.

He was no longer this man who treated me poorly as a child, now he was my father, who, in his way, loved and cared for me. Praise God, that I was able to see that!!!!! I am really looking forward to going to Canada with them this summer with my family!!

Lord, I thank you for the continual songs of worship and praise that you are placing in my heart. It is keeping me in your perfect peace!!!

Praise the Lord with harp: sing unto him with the psaltery and an instrument of ten strings. Psalm 33:2

I am so thankful that I have a job where I can praise him in my connection to the people I work with and the children I teach. Today I will praise him with all that I have within me!!!!

Signing off for now........
Trusting

Psalm 33

Good morning!!

Praise the Lord!! I was able to get through the day with little to no anxiety or irritation. I am so thankful!!! My whole mindset was changed. There was a renewing of my mind. Praise his wonderful name!!!

I decided to go right on to Psalm 33 where it reads in verse one:

Rejoice in the Lord, O ye righteous for praise is comely to the upright.

God is so faithful even in the little things. I am nervous about what I'm going to wear after this dance unit is over. God's word says to consider the lilies of the field and how he provides them with the clothing they need.

I know I can trust in the Lord to help me to find to wear what I need without needing to go out and buy something. Not only is it going to doable, but most times I actually enjoy what I find with his help.

I pray this day for guidance as my husband goes to the dr. for his dizziness. I pray for guidance as I go to the dentist. I pray that you would help all things that need to happen today to get done.

Thank you for your grace and mercy, Lord!!!!!

Signing off for now......
Trusting

Psalm 32:11

Be glad in the Lord, and rejoice, ye righteous: and shout for joy, all ye that are upright in heart. Psalm 32:11

This is a song that comes to mind today.

Be glad ye children of Zion. Rejoice in the Lord your God.
For he has given to you the former rain.
For he will cause to come the former and the latter rain
The vats will overflow with wine and oil
He will restore all the years the locusts have eaten
He will restore all the years that were lost.

I will rejoice in thee and be glad
I will extol your love more than wine
Draw me after thee and we will run together
I will rejoice in thee and be glad

Draw me close to you
You're all I want
You're all I ever needed
You're I want
Help me know that you are near

Today, woke up with the peace and got up and came to spend time with the Lord. Anxiety tried to wrap it's arms around me, but I have pressed into the praises of the Lord today. I am thankful for the reprieve.

I don't know that it will totally go away, but I will continue to ask the Lord to give me the strength to press into him and overcome the anxious feelings that may come my way today.

He is Lord!!!!

Signing off for now.......
Trusting

Still posting

Hello,

I am at a low point. My anxiety is showing up again. Feel shaky and very tired. Stayed home from church today because I was on the verge of tears and was feeling memories from childhood abuse.

Husband was very supportive. Helped me walk it through in my mind and let me feel his belief in me. I guess that's what I need to show to him as well, that I believe in him even though right now finances are so tight and work is a very frustrating issue for him.

I am sitting here with Psalm 32:10. It reads Many sorrows shall be to the wicked: but he that trusteth in the Lord, mercy shall compass him about.

Mercy shall compass me about. I do need mercy this day. I need to know that even though many of my thoughts are not glorifying to God, that I am still his child and that he still "believes" in me.

I just celebrated my 43rd birthday! My mind swarms with thoughts of the future and the present. Many times I will entertain the negative side of the thoughts. Somehow, I have got to overcome that negativity and speak words of life and encouragement to myself.

Life seems bleak to me, but I do believe that is what the enemy would want me to think. I once again, need to sit back and "count my blessings".

Deep breathing
Re-directing my thoughts
Believing that people believe in me
Being thankful for the loving people around me even though they are 2 teenagers and a husband who is definitely going through a mid life experience.

Praise God from whom all blessings flow!!!!

Signing off for now........
Trusting

Psalm 32 : 8

I will instruct thee and teach thee in the way which thou shalt go: I will guide thee with thine eye. Psalm 32 : 8

Oh the desire and yearning in my heart to be taught and instructed in the Lord is great. Unfortunately, I have this flesh that doesn't want any part of being reined in and molded into a mold that requires part of me to be removed to fit into that mold.

I acknowledge that the mold is a unique one. One that has been fashioned for me and only me. I so see the creative hand of God in the fashioning of his saints. Not one comes out looking the same as the other, a perfect unique creation of his hand. Praise his wonderful name!!!!

However, getting to fit into the mold requires shaping and re-shaping of me by the masters loving hands. I do seek for him to be in control and to minister his peace to me while he is doing it. Does that sound somewhat contradictory?

It reminds me of being put in boat tossed and thrown about by crashing waves around while at the same time being at perfect peace in the boat. Jesus was in perfect peace even though he saw the waves pounding at the sides of the boat even to the place where it would seem that the boat was going to tip and yet he remained in oneness with his father and trusted that no matter what happened that all would be well with his soul.

Today, I look to "all being well with my soul". I am trusting in God that my finances will work even though I am definitely in an uncomfortable place in allowing the bank to cover some of my bills with an overdraft protection. I am...........

Trusting

Extra long weekend

Dear Saints,

The past couple of days I have been at home with my family due to 3 days of school closings due to snow, a weekend, and then a holiday. I knew these days would be rough since things are very tough financially.

I did however realize, that my children and very much a stressor in my life. I didn't realize how much until they left for a teen retreat. I was amazed at the peace in our home and even more so reminded of it when they returned from their weekend.

Through out this time with them and without them, I have been through defeat, confusion, frustration, and finally came out on top with an overcoming spirit. I realized that much of the negativity came from me believing lies. Lies straight that came from the pit of hell specially designed to trip me and cause me to fall.

I praise God for church on Sunday. I praise him for his clarity of vision and his uplifting words that he speaks through his faithful servants.

I am indeed thankful for the body of Christ and the encouragement that pours forth from them.

As I go back to school tomorrow, I do look to apply this renewing of my mind to the lives I touch in my work place.

I do praise God for the job that my husband got a call for today. I also praise him for his keeping power.

I also want to thank him for the blessed time that I had with my mother today as we shopped for a small birthday gift for me and then had lunch at a new place. She is so precious to me. I do get choked up as we join arms and sing "Side by Side". I wonder how many more times I will get to do that with her before the Lord calls her home. I must cherish our times now on this earth!!!!

I do look forward to joining my grandmother and my mother in the heavenlies when it is my time to join them. It will be such a sweet reunion!!!!!!

Signing off for now.........
Trusting

Psalm 32:7

Thou art my hiding place; thou shalt preserve me from trouble; thou shalt compass me about with song of deliverance.

Yes the Lord is my hiding place. He is where I go when I am confused, angry, frustrated, needing clarity. He is the one who provides sweet comfort and peace.

My hope is in him.

Again, as I look to the natural, I see bleekness, yet I do see him as my provider and the lifter up of my head.

I must believe that even as he has given such a great sacrifice for me and has sought me out to have relationship with him, that he is also doing the same for my husband, son, and daughter. I must believe that he has a plan and is, in his time, waiting to impart more of himself to them.

This day as I am home during this beautiful snow, I do desire to press into him and hear his words of love and comfort. I am going to try to hold at bay all the negative thoughts that would try to enter my mind, that would cause me to doubt or to see myself as anything less than the priest of God that I am.

May I bless him this day as I open my heart to him and long to hear his voice.

Signing off for now........
Trusting

Lifting one another up

Dear readers,

Today I found myself drawn to others in my church. I called two brothers in the Lord and encouraged them. One was with a phone message and the other just a few words of appreciation spoken.

In this day of financial drought, I am caused to seek out the spiritual wealth that I can have. I am continually turning to my Lord for his words of encouragement and his wisdom.

I do praise him today and look to him to enlarge me spiritually.

Signing off for now.........
Trusting

Psalm 32:6

For this shall every one that is godly pray unto thee in a time when thou mayest be found: surely in the floods of great waters they shall not come nigh unto him.

Psalm 32:6

What waves of comfort overtake me as I read this message. God will protect me even in the floods of great waters!!!!

Blessed be his wonderful name!!!!!

Let your praises be on my lips throughout this day as I putter about and see the peaceful blanket of white snow falling upon this earth.

Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in thy sight, Oh Lord.!!!!!!!!

Signing off for now........
Trusting

The Family of God

I am so thankful today for the family of God. People who love and care for me. Not just in words, but in deeds. A precious brother sent us a card to encourage us, but also to gift us with a check. I called him yesterday to thank him. He poured out his love and appreciation for our family and then proceeded to encourage us in the Lord!!!!

What a vital word of life and way to assure me that "it is well".

God is on the throne and I don't need to be afraid!!!!!

Signing off for now.......
Trusting

My God Shall.......

Supply all my needs!!!! I keep hearing that song over and over in my head. I am so thankful for his provision!!!! I am thankful for the work he is doing in my life. I am thankful for his love for me!!!!

Thank you, Lord, that I am fearfully and wonderfully made!!!!!

I do continue to pray that you will oversee the extension of my degree. It's totally out of my hands and I see you as totally being in control, which is the best place that that decision could be.

Praise be to the Lord God Almighty!!!!

Signing off for now........
Trusting

Psalm 32 : 5

I acknowledged my sin unto thee, and mine iniquity have I not hid. I said, I will confess my transgressions unto the Lord; and thou forgavest the iniquity of my sin.

Thank you, Lord,

That you died to take away my sin. I know I am so bent to self service and to only seeking my desires. It was indeed a blessing driving to work yesterday, worshipping you, and feeling that my heart's desire was linked to your heart's desire.

I know in your mercy that you will not crush me nor can you take your wrath out upon me for my sins because of the great sacrifice your son made for me.

I do stand before you humbly (only in my opinion) and do long for your spirit to move within me, my husband, my children, my church. I look to you to be the author and finisher of my faith.

I do pray for your guiding and leading today and ask that your word would overtake my shortcomings and remind me to stay focused on the precious truths which it affords.

Thank you that I was able to find articles last night and that I was able to do some of the reading for my class. I do place my grad degree in your hands and ask that you intercede on my behalf to finish my degree.

I praise you and glorify your holy name!!!!!!!!

Signing off for now...........
Trusting

Thankful again!!

Good morning, dear readers,

I must say once again that I am thankful. I feel a need to list my thanks today as there are many and I'm sure I will miss some.

Food
Housing
Heat
Health
Friends
Family
My dog
my job
the wonderful people with whom I work
my college class
my working vehicle with heat
church
the ongoing love that the lord has for me
my chldren going on a church retreat
an awesome student teacher
an awesome best friend
my forgiveness
all of my appendages
today is saturday
i get to drink a cup of coffee with vanilla nut creamer today
i am going to my indoor hockey game
my students are singing the national anthem


and as you see the list goes on and on and on!!!!

PRAISE GOD FROM WHOM ALL BLESSINGS FLOW!!!!!

I will rest in all that, today!!!!

Signing off for now........
Trusting

Psalm 32:4

For day and night thy hand was heavy upon me; my moisture is turned into the drought of summer.


I was reminded in church that won't always be "comfortable". God will use all circumstances, whether they seem good or bad to us.

Bad in our minds, should have different consideration. God, I'm sure sees it as challenging, but not bad. I'm sure he knows the grand scheme of things and the outcomes that will come forth from the suffering that is taking place.

I must stand firm in my belief that "he will restore all the years the locusts have eaten"!!!!!

Signing off for now.......
Trusting

Fighting to stay afloat

Good morning, dear readers,

Today or should I say this weekend was trying. I had no energy and just slept and did school work. I guess I did do some wash. Went to church. Felt defeated. Just don't know about this whole life thing sometimes.

I am going to need to rest in the frustration of what is all around me.

Lord, will you please help me to be strong today? Will you help me to get accomplished what needs to be done?

Will you help me to be an overcomer today?

I feel empty and defeated. I feel overcome by financial pressures and also by the lack of provision I can offer for my children.

I feel overwhelmed by the plans that my son is making for his education which involves going into the service.

My daughter is having issues with her weight. I am glad that that is something that can be fixed, but really question my ability to help her with it.

God, I just lay all of this before you and ask that you would give me a peace and a rest about it. It is all so daunting and I am afraid of the way that it will all turn out. I am afraid that my children won't have perfect lives. I guess that isn't realistic, now isn't it?

Life is full of imperfect situations that really I believe that my response is the only thing that God is looking for to be perfect. A perfect response to him would be to stop, listen, and trust. So, Lord, let this day be a day for me to have perfect responses to you, and if not, thank you for your grace and your mercy which I know accompanies each of your overtures to your creation.

Blessed be your name!!!!!

Signing off for now........
Trusting

Breathe in the Fresh Air

Good morning, dear readers,

Today is Saturday. I woke with thoughts of the past week swirling in my head. God spoke that I needed to go outside and "breathe". I took his advice and went out to sit in the freezing cold and allow the sun to shine upon me. I was also able to see the beautiful blue sky that shrouded the trees. Oh, how lovely to breathe in the crisp cool air. How settling it was to my spirit that here again is another day, another gift from God to bless him.

Psalm 32: 3

When I kept silence, my bones waxed old through my roaring all the day long.

Wow, now there is some poetic writing. I was silent, yet I was roaring all the day long. Hmmmmm....... I believe a sin was roaring through and that even though David was silent in words, his spirit was roaring, racing, crying out for cleansing and redemption. So much so, that there was no peace for David until he fully surrendered to his father.

God ran long and hard after David. Did David make mistakes? Yes, he did. Did God lift his hand from David when he ran from him? No, he did not. What a loving father to keep after his son, even after his son turned his back on God.

I woke thinking about my earthly father. We don't share in life, but we do both have the same heavenly Father. Is there an earthly plan for us? I would tend to believe it. But, for now, I need to rest and trust in God's plan and acknowledge that it is higher than mine.

What a sweet essence of life to know that everything that I stand for and believe in is bent toward his higher plan and purpose which will overcome all sickness, disease, and pain. He is the God of all healing and restoration. He, in his timing, will fill all the emptiness in our hearts and will wholly become our "all in all"!!! Praise his name forever more!!!!!

Signing off for now........
Trusting

Psalm 32 :2 continued

Good morning, dear readers,

I am so thankful today!!! There were a number of things that could have gone wrong this week and they didn't and I am sooooooo thankful!!!

My student teacher meeting went well. So far, my impression is favorable. I did get my class registration approved and also registered for my HR class. I am also blessed that I found a book that the university was offering for 150 for 38 online. Praise God!!!!

I am wanting to continue with the 2nd verse today.

Blessed is the man unto whom the Lord imputeth not iniquity, and in whose spirit there is no guile.

The second part, and in whose spirit there is no guile. When I think of guile, I think of ill and harmful thoughts and even deceit. I think of cunning, calculated, plans to overthrow the godliness of man.

How can a person show guile? Let's find out the definition for guile and see if I'm right. Webster says, deceitful and cunning.

Well, calculated deceit can take many forms. I imagine that it wouldn't take much for an individual to heed the whispers of the enemy to position him to take part in a deceitful act. I do know, that as we partake of such actions, that either one of two things can occur. 1 - I will take greater steps to discourage that type of behavior as I allow the Holy Spirit to lead and guide me to cleanse me from all guile. Or, I will see that it's just a little sin and that, well, if I just added a little more deceit or tried to conceal it with greater finesse, that "it would be okay".

All of that is strictly LIES coming directly from the throne of Satan. Indeed, he is the King of all Guile. He has been down that road many, many times in the history of all creation and will continue to make plans to thwart God's perfect plan for his creation.

Lord, grant us ears to hear your voice in this hour. Speak to our hearts and help us to remain pure and spotless as we are faced with more and more people who don't hear from your heart and are self seeking. Let us be a people who ooze with your love and compassion. Let me be a person who extends mercy as great and wonderful mercy has been extended to me. Amen.

Signing off for now......
Trusting

Psalm 32 : 1

Dear Readers,

On Sunday, I was quickened to Psalm 32.

I am hoping to take a verse a day and reflect upon it.

Today's verse says

Blessed is he whose transgression is forgiven, whose sin is covered.
Psalm 32:1

I am reminded of my great need for the Lord. I am also reminded that all I have and am is due to him in a small, small effort to give back to him for all he has done for me.

At times it is easy to forget the gravity of the sacrifice that our Lord made for us. If I were to see it again and again, even that would become dull. I must trust the Holy Spirit to bring to remembrance the price that was paid for me.

I think about when Jesus was on the cross and I believe he saw "me". Sure he saw the millions of all creation when he was there willingly bleeding and dying, but I declare that he saw "me" and that he personally died for me, just as he did for "you"!!

What an awesome thing to be included in such a selfless act of love and mercy! The gift that comes to me from above has no measure. His love is boundless. I am finite in my capacity. He is omnipotent.

He came to be the greatest servant of all and for this I look to turn my life in servitude to him. May my heart be forever tender and loving toward his people and may mercy abound in my judgments.

Blessed be his wonderful name!!!!!

Signing off for now......
Trusting

A day off?

Good morning, dear readers,

Today is my day off from school and work, but we have a wedding. My husband is scrambling to get a fresh coat of finish on his job before the wedding. We have a dinner invitation tomorrow and not sure if that will go through or not. Seems like a lot.

I do have an in-service day on Monday, so no teaching, just sitting and listening. Sometimes that can be relaxing?! Sometimes, not.

My heart goes out to the people of Haiti today. I wake in my warm bed and truly realize the blessing of being able to wake up with my family and have a house standing. Even sitting here and writing this blog seems pretty much like a miracle in my eyes in comparison to the utter devastation the Haitian people are enduring at this very second.

I can't imagine having loved ones and having no way of contacting them to see if they are alright. I can't imagine waking up in a house one morning and having no house to go to that night. I can't imagine the wide scale of destruction that would completely remove all water, electricity, and even the capacity of these people to make a living.

Oh the deep deep emotional wrenching that lies within the hearts of these people. Yet, what else lies there? God does allow these catastrophic events. No one can say why or even know when, but God is placing judgment upon his creation.

I know I serve a God who has a greater plan and can see even through the imprisonment of a young child in piles of rubble and debris as he witnesses their last breaths of life. I trust in him for only he can make a way in these last seconds of our lives. HE IS LORD!!!

I pray that I will be able to say that all the days of my life even through the most dire extremes that may come my way.

Signing off for now........
Trusting

Back in the Swing of Things

Blessings to you readers this day,

I am thankful to say that I am back in the routine of work and teaching privately. My lesson plans are ready to roll for this new cycle and my student teacher is coming next Thursday.

I put together a semi-prof. hockey game opportunity for our students and families to get to a game and then have my chorus sing the national anthem in combination with 2 other elementary schools. Today is the day those ticket requests are being picked up. I am thankful that is out of my hands for now.

Tonight I go practice for the wedding on Saturday. Tomorrow night is the rehearsal. Crazy, crazy week, but in it all, God has blessed me!!!!

My heart goes out to those people in Haiti who have lost loved ones, homes, or are still trying to find loved ones. How devastating!!!!! I am so thankful, that in it all, God has a plan and will use this for his glory in the lives of his people. I can only hold onto the trust that he is in control and will continue to prove himself true to who he is in the coming days.

I don't think that means a happy ever after for any of us, but I do think it means that his kingdom will be furthered in our lives. OUR GOD REIGNS!!!!

Signing off for now......
Trusting

Grace

Dear God,

I thank you for you for the grace that you have given me this week to both enjoy and get much work done at my job. I thank you for the clarity of vision and the guidance in getting me to a place where I can have enough energy, but also eat sensibly.

I also praise and thank you for the productive shopping that my daughter and I did to get her ready for her spring formal. I thank you for the blessing of the 160 coat coming to 30 dollars. My daughter calls it her "miracle coat". Thank you for answering our prayer for both something affordable and that she really really liked!!!!!I praise you for all things!!!!!

Amen.

Signing off for now........
Trusting

Monday

Good morning dear readers,

Well, here we are, Monday morning. The dog got me up last night and had me take her out at 2 am. I wound up sleeping with her on the couch for the rest of the night.

My husband is unsettled and that always affects me as well.

I am going from "dawn to dusk" today. I am thankful that it is a Monday and that I am rested from the weekend. God will give me the grace to pull through today.

His throne is higher than all other thrones
He rules all powers seen and unseen
From generation to generation always the same
From everlasting to everlasting he is God!!!!!

May God grant us all the grace to live and move by his spirit this day.

Signing off for now........

Trusting

Sunday celebration

Good morning, dear readers,

Today is the day when I go to worship my Lord. Today is the day when I go to give thanks to my God for his provision and keeping. Today is the day when I go to say "I Love You, Lord". Today is the day I gather with God's people in his sanctuary to proclaim him as King!!!!!!

My heart is filled with praise and thanksgiving for God today. Even in this mixed up world where wrong seems right, God is still in control and loves his creation. He is the God who will prove faithful and true to his people even when the world has left them behind. He is the God who will prove his love for his people again and again.

We can TRUST him that he will NEVER remove that love or hand of protection upon our lives. I'll say it again. WE CAN TRUST HIM THAT HE WILL NEVER REMOVE THAT LOVE OR HAND OF PROTECTION UPON OUR LIVES!!!!


The Lord will not allow the righteous soul to famish, but he casts away the desire of the wicked.
Proverbs 10:3

You are worthy, O Lord, to receive glory and honor and power; For you created all things, and by your will they exist and were created.
Revelation 5 : 5


God is on the throne today and will be forever more, AMEN!!!!

Signing off for now........

Trusting

Happiness

Good morning, or should I say "good afternoon" as it is 1:12 pm. I spent the whole morning catching up on school work. I did enjoy a cup of coffee and a donut hole as well as a half a bagel with cream cheese for breakfast, real treats.

I was reminded this week that if I don't have things organized in my mind, my room, and my desk, that things quickly fall apart at the seams when you have 22 little kindergarteners waiting impatiently for what you have planned next for them, when you can't find the paper you need right then and there to continue on with your lesson.

It happens to all of us, but dis-organization has been my weakness for many years. I can't say it's there all the time, but when I get moving fast going from class to class, it's very easy for instruments, papers, music, gradebooks, and plans to become misplaced.

I'm not sure what the solution is as I have been suffering from this malady for all my years of teaching. After 20 years, you think I would figure this out, but I haven't as yet. Sure, I can clean off my desk and I can straighten my room at the end of the day, but most days I am so exhausted from the hustle and bustle of teaching 7 - 8 classes and then teaching at least two private lessons after school hours that I don't want to have ANYTHING to do with cleaning and straightening.

Unfortunately, I am not a morning person and therefore, getting into school early and putting things in order, is not usually an option, either.

What does God have to say about this? Well, I do know that he is in the business of bringing spiritual discipline into our lives. I do believe that it would bless him to have this spill over into our earthly lives as well. It all seems so overwhelming to try to fix everything at once.

Perhaps, like God, I should take one small area at a time, and then gradually over time, I will overcome the disorganization and live and breathe in a world or order, which will not only be a blessing to me, but also to God.

Signing off for now.......

Trusting

It's Thursday

Good morning, dear readers,

It's Thursday and where has this week gone? Crazy how time just marches right along. I can always count on that, can't I? Just like I can always count on God's mercy and forgiveness.

Resting today in the words from the visit from our Pastor. It is a time of testing. I can rest in that, because with that I sense that there is a safety net. I mean that even though the test could bring me to hard places, that my God will always be there to pick me up and to wash me white as snow.

Signing off for now.......

Trusting

Believing

Good morning, dear readers,

Last night our Pastor came to our home to talk and pray with us concerning our finances. It was in his wisdom that he confirmed that my husband should take a part time job and then continue to run the business from our home to keep it up and running as well. Praise God for his presence and meeting with us in a very special way last night. I do believe that if the counsel is that a part time job is in order, that also, a part time job will be provided!!!! Praise God!!!!!

Our Pastor kept taking us back to the story of Jacob and his 12 sons and the provision that God had for them in direct result of the horrible selling of Joseph into slavery. Even in the midst of all that confusion and horror for Joseph, God had a plan which very much contained blessing for Joseph in great abundance, but also for his family, which very soon would be in great famine as the people of Egypt were coming into as well.

So many times it is easy to just look on the surface and be disheartened by what we see with earthly eyes. According to this story, what was going on in the eyes of the spirit was preparation and preservation for the many as well as the one. Oh Praise God that he brings forth his perfect provision for all of us. I do want to be a part of the his greater provision!!!!!

Genesis 47 : 11

And Joseph situated his father and his brothers, and gave them a possession in the land of Egypt, in the best of the land, in the land of Rameses, as Pharaoh had commanded.

The great sacrifice of Joseph had brought forth life to many in God's perfect provision for their lives. I say, "amen", Lord, let it be so.

Signing off for now........

Trusting

Day 8

Dear readers,

Wow, I can't believe this is Day 8 already. Yesterday I was so blessed with the contents of my blog. I wrote about cleansing and giving the area of my corrupt communication coming from my mouth to the Lord and asking him to purify me.

I told you I would probably make a mistake and I did, but as I did I was immediately reminded of my morning commitment. The 2nd time I was faced with "do I allow unholy words to come forth", I stopped in midstream. Praise God that he hears my heart's desire to be more like him!!!! He will continue to hear my request to have a pure tongue and bring forth more and more cleansing in the days to come, I am sure!!

Yesterday as my first day back to work. I enjoyed being dressed up again. I did get a perm over break, which was a big change and little eyes opened wide as they came off the bus and saw their music teacher with curls all over her head. Kids are so precious and honest. I knew there would be ones that asked "what happened to your hair?". I smiled and answered their questions. I wasn't offended because I knew the root of their inquiry, not to hurt or inflict pain, but pure curiosity.

I see God's plan for the growth of a child as such a place of comfort and security for me. I did not have a "safe" growing place as a child and in direct result struggle with even allowing myself to be cared for by anyone, especially God. He has taught me to know him in a safe way. I am learning to go to him with an expectation of love and not of condemnation.

I know God loves me and he is teaching me with an everloving heart, that he died for me and for all of his creation to bring us back to himself. To have relationship with us and for us to glorify him, even in our imperfection as we turn our hearts to him even after we fall, he is faithful to embrace us with his arms of comfort and encouragement, once again sending us out into the "big world" to take new steps and even to help others to do the same.

My husband and I sat down with the finances last night. Things looked "short". I know that God will make a way for us. Praise him that my husband is working on 2 jobs and will hopefully get paid for them this week. Also, I got a call from a dear friend who invited us to dinner and also to look at a job that they have for my dear hubby to work on. Praise God, more work!!!!

Psalm 37:23 - 26

The steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord, and he delights in his way.

Though he fall, he shall not be utterly cast down; for the Lord upholds him with his hand.

I have been young, and now am old; Yet I have not seen the righteous forsaken, nor his descendants begging bread,

He is ever merciful, and lends; and his descendants are blessed.

I DO BELIEVE I AM BLESSED!!!!!!!

Signing off for now.......

Trusting

A Cleansing

Good morning, dear readers,

I woke today with the word "cleansing" on my heart. I am taking a stand on my body and putting it through the New Year ritual of a cleanse by only putting certain vitamins and minerals in it and then by not consuming sugar and fatty foods.

When we aren't consuming the same things we have been, that is considered a cleanse. Cleanse means to remove those things that may be inhibiting our bodies or our spirits to function the way they were designed by God.

Cleansing is a deep work. It's not just a wash, which only touches the surface, but it is a work that penetrates deep within our very souls and bodies. As we allow a cleansing to take place we are stripped of our desires and God's desires take their place. Halleluiah!!!

The physical cleanse that I am going through is not, at this stage, a pleasant one. There is an immediate reaction to the lack of sugar and caffeine that I have been consuming in gross amounts over the holidays. Now all the sudden I want to stop? Well, my body makes sure that I hear about that. I have a headache and didn't sleep well at all because of it. I keep drinking water to help the cleanse along.

I wonder if the spirit is much the same? Yesterday, our pastor talked about going through a spiritual inventory and checking different areas in our lives to see if God would want us to freshly commit an area, such as allowing no corrupt communication to come out of our mouths. I was immediately convicted and had to admit that I have not been pure in my speech. We are reminded that the last part of us to be bridled will be the tongue. God help us.

I know that I will be tested in my recommitment of purity of tongue. I know that God will use different opportunities to give me the chance to choose to say things of good report and not cursing or negative talk against my brothers and sisters. Will I fail? Most likely, but God's Holy Spirit will continue to give me the grace to persevere and overcome this unbridled tongue. I will not fail continually and by his grace will come to a place where the words I speak will be a blessing and not a cursing to God and his people.

I am reminded of a chorus that we sing in church.

Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart,
be acceptable in thy sight, Oh Lord,

Oh Lord, my strength and my salvation

Let the words of my mouth and the mediatation of my heart,
be acceptable in thy sight, Oh Lord,

Signing off for now........

Trusting

Judgment on our Land

Dear readers,

Today I am impressed with the upcoming judgment of our land. God's words says

Now I will rise, says the Lord;
Now I will be exalted,
Now I will lift Myself up.

Isaiah 33:10

How can God allow such pain and suffering in our land today? It is a choice that he has given us. You see, in order for us to have free will, he needed to make it so that we would be given over the reigns to our lives in entirety. This autonomy was bestowed upon every man, woman, and child that is born of this earth. In return, our greatest gift to our Lord, will be when we can lay down the autonomy that was gifted to us and place the rule back into the hands of our loving creator.

Only by coming to true surrender to him, by giving him the reigns of our hearts, can we enable him to move on our behalf. Even, then, we sometimes find that he doesn't move on our behalf, but brothers and sisters, I assure you that he does. Even in the midst of trials and calamities, he is there. He is still ever present and ever protecting. However, he sees the bigger picture. Only he knows our hearts and what we are capable of. Only he can allow the pain and suffering that his chosen ones endure to bring us through to his perfect plan and purpose for his glory.


I know it is so hard to understand why we or our loved ones are suffering, but be assured that God is moving and working for us, his beloved church, his beloved people of all creation who he died for to reconcile us all to himself.

Whether you acknowledge this unending, unconditional love, is your choice.

The sinners in Zion are afraid
Fearfulness has seized the hyprocitres;
Who among us shall dwell with the devouring fire?
Who among us shall dwell with everlasting burnings:
He who walks righteously and speaks uprightly,
He who despises the gain of oppressions,
Who gestures with his hands, refusing bribes,
Who stops his ears from hearing of bloodshed,
And shuts his eyes from seeing evil:
He will dwell on high;
His place of defense will be the fortress of rocks;
Bread will be given him,
His water will be sure.

Isaiah 33:14 - 16

Signing off for now........

Trusting

Anxious

Dear Readers,

Today I woke with a heaviness in my heart. I felt the sinking feeling of depression creeping upon me. I just wanted to stay on the couch with the dog who woke me up in the middle of the night to go out and then after letting her out I found that she still pooped on the carpet. (sigh).

I decided to sleep on the couch with her since it was very cold outside and she wouldn't settle. I heard her pacing around trying to find some place warm. I sleep so well with her cuddled up next to me. The next thing I remember is waking up with the clock saying 10 am, which is the latest I have slept in since the beginning of my vacation. This was my last hurrah for a day to sleep in and not have to go anywhere at a specific time. Sad.

Yesterday I went to my parents for the traditional New Year's pork and sauerkraut dinner. So good. I ate entirely too much and was uncomfortable for most of the afternoon.

My dear cousin did call and gave an update that she and her husband are going to try to reconcile. Oh, praise God for answered prayers!!!! I recently got into contact with her due to a family trial. I am glad to be able to pray for her. I know God is speaking to her heart and also her husband's as well. He will restore all the years the locusts have eaten!!!!

I find myself looking to God for assurance this morning. I need his peace. I need to know that he will continue to be with me even as the whirlwind of work begins again. I know that it will be vital for me to keep plugged into the Lord. It tends to be that I push him aside as my days become busier. This however is the time that I need to press into him deeper and deeper to keep hearing his voice and block out the lies that continually vie for my attention.

I added a picture of the peaceful water today because that is what my need is.

Isaiah 32:16-20

Then justice will dwell in the wilderness and righteousness remain in the fruitful field.

The work of righteousness will be peace, and the effect of righteousness, quietness and assurance forever.

My people will dwell in a peaceful habitation, in secure dwellings, and in quiet resting places,

Though hail comes down on the forest, and the city is brought low in humiliation.

Blessed are you who sow beside all waters, who send out freely the feet of the ox and the donkey.

I am thankful for these words of assurance today. I am indeed in need of his peace and will strive to enter into his rest in the coming days.

Signing off for now.........

Trusting

Relaxed

Good morning dear readers,

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!!

We did stay up last night and did the count down. I didn't fall asleep this year. Kind of hard with a teenage daughter who gets loud when things like that happen. Also, we live right next to a fire station and they put the siren off. On top of that the city put off fireworks which we could hear echoing in the distance.

Today we are going to my parents to have pork and sauerkraut. It is a blessing that all of my immediate family is talking. We have gone years without talking to one another due to trauma that was inflicted upon us as children.

I am blessed that we are still a "unit". I don't have the relationship that I would like with my father, but after reading "The Shack", which I would highly recommend to anyone who has hurt in their past, I have found a new hope for restoration. It may not happen in this earth, but I do believe in a heavenly restoration and forgiveness.

I am blessed that my husband and I were able to go shopping yesterday and buy food. Since funds are limited, we agreed to have a fondue night, which we've not done before. My sister and brother in law came. It wasn't the Melting Pot, but we made our own ambience and laughed the night away. In some ways it was better.

I am continuing to trust in God's provision as the time of my vacation is coming to a close. I will endeavor to fight through any negative that comes my way and see Christ victorious in each and every situation, even though, through my earthly eyes, it may not seem that way.

Signing off for now.......

Trusting